Harry, liked your thoughts,
“But, it also allows you to recognise that some of your emotions are not necessary, that if you just alter your perception you can avoid a world of needless pain”.
Dr. David R. Hawkins has great books I think you might enjoy (If you haven’t already). If you want to go a little deeper into what you have been pursuing.
He talks in his book, “Letting Go” about a way of being, “It does not proceed from the mind; rather, it emanates from the heart”.
Dr. Hawkins goes on to say when you grow spiritually you learn to live by your vision of the world that replaces the constant perceptions of right and wrong.
I wholeheartedly agree with you on this, “Ordinary people do not seek saintly perfection — they seek to experience their life to its fullest”.